She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Randomize
