the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
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