Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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