I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
