we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I love you. Go after that dick
where are my eyebrows?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
