Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I supernannyed him into submission
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
