Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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