Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
