We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
My vagina is very pro this idea
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
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