he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Randomize
