He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
