i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
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