No, drunk sperm still make babies.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
