You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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