So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
