hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Can you bring me the toilet please
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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