I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
