Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
Randomize
