it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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