it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
