She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
