I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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