The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
