No, you can still breathe under the balls.
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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