would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
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