did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
