I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
What drink are we having for lunch?
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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