the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
Randomize