I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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