yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize
