smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
