how do flat chested girls get laid?
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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