Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
