The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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