I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
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