new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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