if you like me you must not know who I am
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
