i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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