I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Randomize