I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
