its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
