I like to think it a success when the cops are called
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
