Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
