making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
