Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I love the barter system - he got laid and I got him to bring me some ibuprofen. A win-win really.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Randomize
