I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
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