Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
