i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
