clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
