The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
Randomize
