I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize
